I’m not sure when it will get into Mother’s head that I’m wearing a thick double coated fur coat and spending a day at the beach where the sun shines the hottest is not my idea of fun! Does she realise that humans go and lie around in practically nothing? Teeny tiny pieces of cloth! Does she know that they do that because they are HOT?? As much as I’d like to take off my coat and sun tan, I can’t (and won’t. I’m a shy boy!) Here are some pictures of our most recent trip to Sentosa, Tanjong and Silosa beach (Mother’s way of making up to me for being away for so long).

I am so handsome, I really don’t know what to say. Look at that manly profile. WOW.

Mother decided to stop at Coastes so I can rest but I think that’s just an excuse for her to guzzle down a margarita. At least she thought of me and ordered bbq chicken wings and some ice cubes! Yum. Their chicken wings and thin crust pizza ROCK!

Again, we were not short of stupid people making “woof woof” sounds. Really. I bark because I’m a dog. You bark because you’re a retarded moron?

We walked the whole length of the beach from Tanjong beach at the Sentosa Resort and Spa all the way to Siloso beach at Rasa Sentosa Resort.

Then Mother thought it would be fun (her idea of fun not mine) to go to the Underwater World. There was a pond of turtles there and I must admit, those creatures fascinate me! Mother was afraid I was going to jump in because I actually put my 2 paws on the rocks to get a closer look. She brought me down the steps to see them in the underwater enclosure. Wooo. I want to be a fish! They looked so carefree drifting through the water!

There was a guy carrying a snake near the pond. Mother asked if I wanted to take a picture of a snake draped around my neck for $6! No. Thank. You.  I’d rather not die today.

“Maybe I should set up a table and charge people to take pictures with YOU, boy. You’re gathering alot of attention!” said Mother. And I was. I was like a celebrity. Everyone flocked towards me and asked to pet me. If I could I would lift my paw and do the Queen’s wave. Careful now, don’t mess the fur.

“Ooh! Look! A shark!” A shark?? WHERE?!

Sigh. The humiliation. At least she didn’t make me sit on it or something. Or pretend to bite it or whatever tourists do to shark models.

We stayed in Sentosa till about 8pm, doing equally stupid things of course, while we waited for Father to pick us up. I wished Father could have come earlier!! Sigh.

Here’s a nice shot of ME. And the beach at night.

Mother and Father are back! After leaving me to fend the wild (ok, maybe not so wild) by meself for 12 days, they have finally come home! They went off to the UK and to some places in Scotland and England.

Mother said they visited a lovely couple with FOUR SHELTIES! Hmpf. I feel betrayed. Mother gushed about this handsome male called Quito and how Bouba’s so focussed and how Lizzie has got a herding streak and how Luna’s so sweet. HMPF. I think she didn’t miss me at all! She spent some hours with the Fleurdemai shelties playing with them and patting them, while I sit pining away, waiting for them, jumping up and running out at every little sound outside. HMPF. I’ll show her! I’ll ignore her today!

Mother said also that they drove around the countryside alot. This might explain why all the toys she brought back were livestock. She got me a rubber pig that oinks, a lamb fleece pull toy and a squawking fowl (Mother says alot of this end up as road kill) amongst others. She said she thought pets kingdom at Harrod’s rocked! And that there were soooo many things there! She wanted to buy more stuff but Father said there was no more space in the luggage. Bah. Bring bigger bags, people!

When Mother came home and I was chewing and licking her hands, I almost cracked my teeth on a rock. She’s now got this sparkly bling thing on her hand. Mother very excited told me that Father “proposed”. I don’t know what he “proposed” tho’, coz she didn’t say anything after that. Weird. *shrugs*

Mother took me to Sentosa island a couple of weeks back! It wasn’t really the first time I’ve seen the sea (we went to East Coast park ages ago for the first sheltie gathering I attended).

I quite like frolicking in the water! The bubbly surf moves! So enticingly! Out into the sea, then back onto the shore, out again, then back. I was hoping I could grab me some of that but all I got was a mouthful of salt water. Tasty!

Mother was so not prepared to go to a beach. She didn’t bring towels or anything, so I had to air dry my butt. We walked through crowds dripping! So unglam Mother. 

There was this one boy who was walking behind us that kept making stupid irritating “woof woof” noises like it’s a rabid dog. *rolls eyes* Mother got quite annoyed so she sat me down on the side of the path and as they walked by, she made me bark loudly! ROAWWRRRRR (or something like that *ahem*) The boy jumped and his father quickly turned to him and said “hurry up, walk faster”. TEE HEE HEE. Mother and I had a good chuckle. Don’t think just because I look like Lassie you can make fun of ME. 

 This is my stylo shot. I told Mother to take it. She couldn’t stop rolling her eyes at my vanity. I looked hot! And I was wearing a new collar and leash! Of course I want to capture my astounding handsomeness against a backdrop of blue sky, turquoise sea and sandy beach!

Ma! Look! Pretty girlies over there! Sentosa is great. All these young teenage girls come up to me and coo and say how cute and handsome I look and they pat me and make such a big fuss! While Mother stands there hands on her hips, rolling her eyes trying hard to not make it obvious that she is jealous she doesn’t have teenage boys fawning over her. I can’t help it if I’m gorgeous, Mother.

Hey Mother! I’m home! *takes off leash* I think need a bath. 

Mum? Mum! It’s me! Your beloved Romeo! *blinks* MUM! Wait! 

Why are you screaming and running away?? 

Dirty wet rat? What dirty wet rat?!? Where!! *looks around*

Thank you for coming to my pawty and for all the fabulous gifts! I love them! Hope you all had a great time! Mother says I might have to make do with just her, Father and a cupcake for my 2nd birthday because she’s completely knackered from the pawty. I don’t know what she’s complaining about when I was the one going around making sure everyone had a great time!

See you all again soon!

If you want to see pictures of the pawty, they are available here and here (thanks to Pirate!).

Mother constantly says to me “Boy, it’s important that you develop good self control ok? You must learn that even when you’re super excited and aroused, when mummy asks you to do something, your brain must function! It must work! In order to do this you must learn self control.” What the heck for Mother? “So that if you see a bird, which gets you really excited and which you reeeeally want to chase, I can easily get you to go against all the instincts in your little body and get you to sit right there and not move an inch towards the birdie.” Pfffffft. Hmpf.

So one of Mother’s favourite past times is getting me riled up and then getting me to do the opposite of what I really want to do. It’s VERY ANNOYING! She started with randomly asking me to sit or lie down or drop things I’m holding or not to touch things she throws at me, when I wasn’t very excited. She said if she did it when I’m “past my threshold” she’ll just get a super hyper dog running around not caring if he ran into a wall (which is kind of true). Apparently to get this to self-control thing to work it’s important to know your threshold level – that is, at what point can you be excited but still listen to your mum?

Mother’s trying to get me to do a fast drop while doing my zoomies (running around the house, jumping on furniture, going slightly mental) but she’s not been very successful. Well, duh! Clearly by that point I’m like WAAAY in the orbit of ultra excitement and not even thinking. Try again next time Mother! 

Here’s a video of Mother torturing me with this self control stuff. She actually does something like this every morning before she goes to work, that cruel cruel woman! She’ll get a toy that can hold treats (like the turtle that you can stuff with squeaker eggs, or the bag with a rope and a ball attached to it at the end) and will stuff a small piece of pig’s ear or tendon in it. Then she’ll make me sit, and will toss the toy with the treat so tantalizingly close to me and will tell me to leave it!! *screams* Then she walks further away and calls me to her, making me walk right past the toy with the yum yums!! THEN she’ll wait until I sit and look at her before she says I can take the toy!! ARGH!!!

I’m having a barkday pawty to celebrate my first birthday! YOU’RE INVITED! Let me know if you and your human are coming ok? Mother needs to give the numbers to the food people so all humans and dogs get something to eat and drink!

It will be held on 22nd March 2009 (Sunday) at 4pm held at K9 Kulture (Turf City)!

Woohoo! I want to now be called RAMBO! (Though it will be very confusing for Mother whose favourite mouse is called Rambo) I received my first BATTLE WOUND! On my neck too! So hot. So macho. I’ll have a sexy scar to show off to the ladies this weekend at the dog run!

Remember that crazy little jack russell terrier hanging off me in the video I posted not long ago? The sister of the brother I was annoying? Yes, well, she actually BIT ME! 2 weeks ago! YES! I KNOW! HOW COOL IS THAT! What? Not cool? Why is everyone like Mother!! She also thinks it’s not cool. She thinks I’m nuts too for the following reasons (I quote):

1. “You didn’t yelp or whine or anything! You just took it silently?!? You? Drama queen of the year? The dog that tripped over his own feet while being chased by a husky and screamed bloody murder and made me think you broke your leg when all you got was a tiny scratch!??”

2. “How can you continue to hound the brother and hang around the sister the whole time they were at the dog run?? I remember that day – you didn’t want to leave their table until they had left! Why would you want to be near the dog that just bit you??”

3. “You crazy little mutt! You even played with the JRT that bit you last week!! Don’t tell me you can’t remember the scent of the one that attacked you? Is this like some sort of canine Stockholm syndrome where you love the dog that attacked you??”

Mother doesn’t actually blame the JRT for biting me, because she says I deserve it for annoying the crap out of the JRT’s brother. It’s not a deep wound anyway. My collar got in the way and she thinks only two fangs punctured my neck. We went to the vet and he shaved off a bit of fur there (I told him not too much because I still want to look super handsome) and gave me an antibiotic jab that made me woozy and lethargic. I missed the sheltie gathering because of that (and the rain)!

I’m all better now if you were wondering. It’s healed nicely and Mother thinks there actually won’t be a scar. DANG IT!

OH YES!! Did I tell you? I was trying to push the boundaries and test the water last weekend! Being my naughty rebellious adolescent self, I was on Mother’s couch in her room doing my cute digging thing and amusing her while she watched me with her camera in hand. Then!! Guess what I did!! GUESS!!

I LIFTED MY LEG AND PEED ON THE COUCH AND THE COUCH PILLOW!! Teeheeheeheehee. Boy it was hilarious! I was looking right at Mother when I did it! You should have seen Mother’s face! Her jaw dropped and her eyes were wide like saucers! Then of course, she gathered her wits and before the last trickle of pee left my body, she said Bad Boy! picked me up and dumped me in my time out area. I was given a 45 minute time out!! But you know, between you and me, it was well worth it!! Heehee. SSSSHHH!!!!

Me: Mum, I’m getting giddy from going around and around.

Mother: One more time Romeo, WEAVE!

Me: No Mother. I don’t want to do it anymore.

Mother: C’mon boy. It’s fun!

Me: Explain to me how weaving through your legs is fun.

Mother: It’s like dancing!

Me: But you just stand there.

Mother: We do it with me standing first, then you weave through my legs while I walk! So cool right?

Me: Mum, I’m getting giddy from going around and around.

Here’s a brighter video of the door closing. Mother is very eager to fade out the pink coaster target because I have developed a liking for Blutack.